Keywords by David Yonke

Interesting news item from the Vatican:

MUSLIMS MORE NUMEROUS THAN CATHOLICS: VATICAN: Islam has overtaken Roman Catholicism as the biggest single religious denomination in the world, the Vatican said on Sunday. Monsignor Vittorio Formenti, who compiled the Vatican's newly-released 2008 yearbook of statistics, said Muslims made up 19.2 percent of the world's population and Catholics 17.4 percent. "For the first time in history we are no longer at the top: the Muslims have overtaken us," Formenti told Vatican newspaper L'Osservatore Romano in an interview, saying the data referred to 2006.
This was reported by the very reliable Levine Breaking News Elert.
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Speaking of the the Vatican, I got a note today that an art exhibit is coming to Cleveland on May 31 titled "Vatican Splendors from Saint Peter's Basilica, the Vatican Museums, and the Swiss Guard." It will only be shown in 3 U.S. cities and feature 200 rare obejcts from the Vatican's collection.

I just had to use that headline, corny as it is. I covered the Dalai Lama's talk in Ann Arbor yesterday. His Holiness is back there today but I'm not covering it again.
He was quite charming when he chatted with the crowd, laughing and joking quite a bit. But when he got into his lecture on Buddhist teachings, he was all business and the talks were quite boring for non-adherents. Very intellectual theological and philosophical treatises on Buddhism, spoken in Tibetan, with translation. While the Dalai Lama was talking for 10 minutes or so in Tibetan, it was hard to pay attention. Then the translator would talk for 10 or 15 minutes. So it was a weird setup. I wish he had spoken in English. He is so personable when he speaks directly with an audience.
As it was, I enjoyed at times just listening to his voice, the tones and inflections, and his occasional chuckle. Language is an amazing thing.
In my research, I found that the first time His Holiness came to the United States was 1979, and the pope was here at the same time. Interesting, isn't it, that they both are in the United States the same time now. Rare coincidence.
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Covering the talk was a hassle because there was no parking for media and no place in the basketball arena to file stories from. I had to leave right before the end to beat crowd out of the venue, then drive to a panera bread. Once I settled in, I found that the wireless was down. Fortunately the wireless came on eventually and I was able to file my story -- and drink a good cup of coffee while I finished things up.
You can read my two Dalai Lama stories here:
Saturday
Sunday
Toledo, Ohio
April 20, 2008
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Did you catch this news item published last week? I thought it was very interesting. This is a topic that I've thought about quite a bit, being a science fiction fan and an amateur astronomer.
Does the Bible rule out life on other planets, just because it does not mention such a possibility?
I'd love to hear your thoughts on this topic. Here's the news from Vatican City:
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Vatican scientist says belief in God and aliens is OK

By Philip Pullella
Reuters

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

The Vatican's chief astronomer says there is no conflict between believing in God and in the possibility of "extraterrestrial brothers" perhaps more evolved than humans.

"In my opinion this possibility (of life on other planets) exists," said Rev. Jose Gabriel Funes, a 45-year-old Jesuit priest who is head of the Vatican Observatory and a scientific adviser to Pope Benedict.

"How can we exclude that life has developed elsewhere," he told the Vatican newspaper L'Osservatore Romano in an interview in its Tuesday-Wednesday edition, explaining that the large number of galaxies with their own planets made this possible.

Asked if he was referring to beings similar to humans or even more evolved than humans, he said: "Certainly, in a universe this big you can't exclude this hypothesis."

In the interview headlined "The extraterrestrial is my brother," he said he saw no conflict between belief in such beings and faith in God.

"Just as there is a multiplicity of creatures on earth, there can be other beings, even intelligent, created by God. This is not in contrast with our faith because we can't put limits on God's creative freedom," he said.

"Why can't we speak of a 'brother extraterrestrial'? It would still be part of creation," he said.

Funes, who runs the observatory which is based south of Rome and in Arizona, held out the possibility that the human race might actually be the "lost sheep" of the universe.

"There could be (other beings) who remained in full friendship with their creator," he said.

THE "BIG BANG?"

Christians have sometimes been at odds with scientists over whether the Bible should be read literally and issues such as creationism versus evolution have been hotly debated for decades.

The Inquisition condemned astronomer Galileo in the 17th century for insisting that the earth revolved around the sun. The Catholic Church did not rehabilitate him until 1992.

Funes said dialogue between faith and science could be improved if scientists learned more about the Bible and the Church kept more up to date with scientific progress.

Funes, an Argentine, said he believed as an astronomer that the most likely explanation for the start of the universe was "the big bang," the theory that it sprang into existence from dense matter billions of years ago.

But he said this was not in conflict with faith in God as a creator. "God is the creator. There is a sense to creation. We are not children of an accident ...," he said.

"As an astronomer, I continue to believe that God is the creator of the universe and that we are not the product of something casual but children of a good father who has a project of love in mind for us," he said.

Toledo, Ohio
May 19, 2008

Ever try to do your homework or read a book or say a prayer when your stomach is craving food? Except for intentional fasts, being hungry interferes with your desire to do just about anything.
That's why I'm so impressed with people like Steve and Beth Dailey, Toledoans who are working as missionaries in the Philippines. There they head up a program that feeds 800 poor children every day.
"Studies clearly show proper nutrition provides not only good physical growth, but strong mental and immune system development as well," Steve said. "Our desire is to provide spiritual nourishment in addition to meeting the nutritional needs of the child."
I'm including the Daileys in an upcoming article on how the falling value of the dollar is affecting American missionaries overseas. Meanwhile, they have a great website where you can read about all about their ministry. Here's a link.
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Toledo, Ohio
June 3, 2008

Here is a report by the Pew Forum on the Anglican crisis that is worth reading for anyone interested in how the denomination got to this point.

Last Friday, Rocky Twyman of Maryland came to Toledo and joined up with a small group of people at two gas stations to pray for lower gas prices. Earlier that day, the price of gas jumped 20 to 29 cents a gallon in Toledo, to 4.099 at most stations.
Well yesterday as I was driving home I saw the price of regular gas at $3.809 per gallon -- at both BP and Speedway, on the corner of Talmadge Rd. and Sylvania Ave. I drive by those two stations every day on the way to work and for me, they are the local bellwethers. Speedway almost always changes its price first, BP soon after, then every other station in town seems to follow suit.
As I stopped to get gas, I wondered how much Rocky Twyman's "Pray at the Pump Movement" had to do with the 29 cents per gallon saving.
I also read yesterday that there are some new signs that gas prices are going to drop in the long-term.
Funny thing, when I wrote about Rocky Twyman and his prayers to "deliver us from high gas prices," I got very mixed responses. Some people thought it was ludicrous, while others praised me for writing such an article for the mainstream news.
As usual, people read into the news articles according to their own preconceptions, or "worldview" as the buzzword goes, and then either love me or hate me for reporting the news objectively.
Then this morning I saw BP had spiked its price back to $4.09 while Speedway was still holding it at $3.80. Let's see what they're at on my way home tonight.
I'm really wondering what will happen over the July 4th weekend, aren't you? This is a big holiday weekend for traveling in the United States. Will the oil conglomerates gouge us even more, or are they sated with the multizillion-dollar profits they've already devoured this year? I'm guessing they want more.
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My old buddies Hootie and the Blowfish are coming to town! Maybe I can get out on the golf course with them again.
What a great band and wonderful group of guys. They rose to the top and their careers then tapered off, but they were level-headed all the way. The superficial self-anointed "critics" may look at them as washed up, but in reality these guys reached a level of fame and fortune that very few musicians (or any other career people) ever achieve. It never went to their heads, at least not very much. They were smart with their money and are set for life. They now make music for the love of it, regardless of the chart hits or commercial success.
Not a bad spot to be in.
I still love their songs, which are part of life's soundtrack for the 1990s.
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Sad to see George Carlin passed away. He was a brilliant guy and very, very funny. I interviewed him a couple of times and he was always interesting, although he was bitterly anti-religion. I hope he's in a good place now.
Among his many funny lines, I always liked this one the best:
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
Toledo, Ohio
June 24, 2008

Toledo may not be alone in having a priest convicted of murder, depending on how this story develops. Be sure to read the quote at the end of this article. -- David

Vatican: Church defends Marcinkus
Ex- Vatican bank chief linked to kidnapping 25 years ago

(ANSA) - Vatican City, June 24 - The Vatican has lashed out at allegations that a former head of the Vatican bank may have been involved with the kidnapping of a 15-year old girl 25 years ago.

The Vatican said the accusations were ''infamous and without foundation'' and made against someone ''who has been dead for some time and cannot defend themself''.

''We do not wish to interfere in any way with the efforts of the judiciary to ascertain facts and responsibilites.... but at the same time we cannot help but express our firm disapproval for the way certain information has been made public, in a manner more bent on sensationalism than ethical and professional sincerity''.

Emanuela Orlandi, the daughter of a Vatican employee, disappeared in May 1985 and has never been seen or heard of since. It was initially thought that she was taken hostage in order to be exchanged with Ali' Agca, the Turkish terrorist who shot Pope John Paul II in 1981.

Recent testimony leaked to the press claimed that she was kidnapped by a renowned gangster acting on orders from Msgr. Paul Marcinkus, the then-head of the Istitito per le Opere Religiose - the Institute for Religious Works - also known as the Vatican bank.

The testimony reportedly came from Sabrina Minardi, the onetime wife of former soccer star Bruno Giordano who later became the girlfriend of Enrico De Pedis, a leader of the notorious Rome Magliana gang in the 1980s.

According to press reports, Minardi told investigators that De Pedis kidnapped Orlandi and later killed her, dumping her body in a cement mixer.

She said she thought De Pedis did it as a favor to Marcinkus, who was allegedly involved in laundering the Magliana gang's illegal earnings abroad and wanted to ''send a message high up''.

De Pedis was gunned down in broad daylight on a central Rome street in 1990. Msgr. Marcinkus had resigned his IOR position a year earlier and six months after De Pedis' death he returned to his native Chicago, in United States.

Msgr. Marcinkus later retired to Arizona, where he died in February 2006.

The Vatican official sparked controversy for his involvement with Roberto Calvi, the chairman of Milan's private Banco Ambrosiano who was dubbed ''God's banker''.

Calvi, a member of the secret P2 Masonic lodge of Lucio Gelli, was found hanged in London in June 1982, triggering the nation's biggest postwar banking scandal. According to Magliana gang supergrass Antonio Mancini, De Pedis did kidnap Orlandi but to extort money from the Vatican to make up for the huge amount of cash it lost through Calvi.

Sicily's Cosa Nostra is also believed to have lost a lot of money through Calvi and some believe may have been behind his 'suicide'. Investigators are believed to be somewhat skeptical of Minardi's testimony because she also reportedly claims that Orlandi was thrown into the cement mixer along with the 11-year-old son of another Magliana gang member who disappeared in 1993, three years after De Pedis was killed and ten years after Orlandi was kidnapped.

Orlandi's family has also expressed its doubts on the validity of Minardi's testimony.

The appearance of her testimony in the press prompted an investigation by police who searched the offices of the AGI Italian news agency, which may be accused of violating court secrecy.

Despite his criminal record, De Pedis was buried in a crypt in the Church of St Apollinaire, near the central Piazza Navona, next to members of the clergy and the nobility.

The interment was said to have been authorised by the late Cardinal Ugo Poletti, who at the time was Vicar of Rome, in recognition of the ''offerings'' De Pedis had made.

According to fellow gang member Mancini, De Pedis ''was very religious, he killed people but he was a religious person''.

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Toledo, Ohio
June 25, 2008

From the Boston Globe's story on the Pew Forum's survey of American religious life:

"Another finding almost defies explanation: 21 percent of self-identified atheists said they believe in God or a universal spirit, with 8 percent 'absolutely certain' of it."

To say this is a contradiction in terms is the understatement of our young millennium. It is literally impossible for an atheist to believe in God. I just checked with Webster's Dictionary and the definition of an atheist has not changed:
"n. a person who denies or disbelieves the existence of a supreme being or beings."

In my mind, there can only be two explanations:
1. the survey questions were poorly worded, which seems unlikely given the reputation of the Pew Forum, or
2. Fears or concerns on the part of self-professed atheists to speak freely about their disbelief. I would lean toward this one.
Any other theories out there? I'd be interested in hearing them.
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Toledo, Ohio
June 25, 2008

Sister Christine Schenk

I wrote an article last week about Sister Christine Schenk, founder of FutureChurch. Her group, based in Cleveland but with national membership, has done a great deal of research about the state of the Catholic Church and its leaders are convinced that the only way to assure Catholics have full access to the sacraments in the long term is by eventually allowing making celibacy optional for priests and by ordaining women.
These ideas trigger a lot of emotion and stir up debate among Catholics (although they're not an issue in most churches today), but one thing that is not debatable about Sister Christine is that her arguments are reasonable, well thought out, and non-confrontational. She is genuinely concerned for the future of the American Catholic Church and truly loves the church. She and her group are seeking ways to keep it healthy and able to minister to the faithful, and are willing to take the heat by promoting what they believe to be viable solutions. Obviously, there are strong feelings on either side of these issues.
My article generated a surprising amount of letters and calls from readers. Sister Christine will be speaking at 7 tonight (July 9) at the United Methodist Church in Kansas, Ohio, on the topic of what Catholics can do to prevent their parishes from being closed.
You can read my article here and find out more about her organization, FutureChurch, here.
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Sylvania, Ohio
July 9, 2008

Here is a link to the article I wrote about Dottie Zimmerman, the Toledo woman who teaches religion at a Catholic school and also "channels" dead Italian saint Padre Pio.
It is, without a doubt, one of the strangest articles I've ever written but one that is quite fascinating. I've gotten a lot of responses, both pro and con but mostly claiming the woman must be a lunatic or demonic.
Unfortunately my second story on the topic, one that offers expert views on channeling, did not appear on the web at first, which made the main story look unbalanced. I'm glad to say they're both online now and linked.
You can also listen to excerpts of Dottie as Padre Pio.
Somewhat surprisingly, that article was No. 1on The Blade website yesterday while the Robinson appeals court verdict was No. 5. I had been curious how they would do in comparison.
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Toledo, Ohio
July 13, 2008

I had the pleasure of interviewing Father Paul Besanceney this week and writing an article about him. You can read it here.
Father Paul is an 84-year-old Jesuit priest who teaches at a seminary in Sudan. He's from Toledo and has been in Africa 28 years.
I asked him why he went to Sudan in the first place and he looked at me like I had asked a dumb question: "Because my provincial sent me," he said.
What a great sense of trust and duty. The priest, who has a doctorate in sociology from Michigan State, knew his provincial must have felt there was a need for Jesuit educators and that his superior must have chosen him for a reason.
So he went.
Twenty eight years later, he's still serving in Sudan.
Father Paul was kind of quiet, very reserved and soft spoken in the interview. He walked with small but rapid steps through the hallways of the Jesuit Center at St. John's high school. It was an honor to meet him.
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I spent a great deal of time this week working on an article about First Unitarian Church moving from the Old West End to a small building in South Toledo. What started as a pretty straightforward story turned into a lenghty task in which I interviewed more than 30 people. A typical news story involves interviews with from one to five sources.
I ended up looking into the whole issue of aging urban congregations dealing with shrinking membership and rising maintenance costs.
In the end, I didn't use half of the stuff I got from all those interviews and had to really narrow the focus to fit the space I was allotted for it. But I think the story worked out fine and I'll file the extra info away for another time.
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Sylvania, Ohio
July 26, 2008

OBAMA SAYS MUSLIM ISSUE IS 'NO-WIN SITUATION'

By Gromer Jeffers Jr.
Dallas Morning News
07/28/08

Sen. Barack Obama said Sunday that responding to incorrect assertions that he's a Muslim has put him in a "no-win situation."

If he allows the Internet rumors and other misleading information to go unchallenged, it's an affront to his Christianity and could cost him support from voters who don't want a Muslim in the White House. But if he aggressively confronts the rumors, it could suggest to some that there's something wrong with being a Muslim.

"This is a classic example of a no-win situation," Mr. Obama told hundreds of journalists gathered in Chicago for the UNITY convention for journalists of color.

"I have repeatedly said I'm not a Muslim, but this whole strategy of suggesting that I am is indicative of anti-Muslim strategy that we have to fight against," he said.

Mr. Obama said he also didn't want his religion to be falsely identified as a matter of respect for his own faith.

"If you were a Muslim and somebody consistently said you were a Christian, I suspect that you would want to have that corrected," he said.

The Christian Science Monitor (which is a first-rate newspaper, in case you didn't already know) had a story today that Saudi Arabia's religion police are trying to ban people from walking their dogs.
It seems that young Saudi men have been taking their dogs out for walks and while doing so were seen flirting with young Saudi women! I know, you're as shocked as I am about it.
But no need to panic.
The Commission to Promote Virtue and Prevent Vice, which is commonly called the religion police, said this is a sin against Islam, so they want to ban everyone from walking their dogs.
Here's the article. It's definitely worth reading.
Thankfully, a lot of Saudis interviewed by the CSM reporter said they believe such a ban would be ridiculous and predicted that it will be a failure if they attempt to enforce it.
It's not a sin against God to walk a dog, they assert, and the Prophet Mohammed never forbade such a thing. The only verse that the virtue cops could find to make their case actually involved a recommendation by the Prophet against buying and selling dogs and cats, not owning or walking them.

"Now don't come and tell me that dogs are a yucky creature," says Saudi-born veterinarian Maged Elhayek. "They're a beautiful creature and the more I know people, the more I love my dog."

It is unfortunately too common for people in religious authority to intentionally twist their interpretations of holy scripture or give partial truths for their own ulterior motives, and this is a perfect example. But not everyone is blindly accepting the idea.

I'm prettier than the dog, if I want to flirt with women, I'd just use myself!" says young Mohammed Al Anezi. "I wouldn't need the dog."

I applaud the Saudis who will stand up to this kind of misue of authority. It seems like a little thing in this case, but if the religion police are not questioned or challenged you could end up living under tyranny like the Talibans when they ruled Afghanistan and executed people for trivial "abuses," all in the name of religion.

Sylvania, Ohio
August 12, 2008

P.S. Here's my daughter's cute little pup Roxie, who has me wrapped around her little paw... I take her and Scotty for walks every day and not once did I feel it was grieving God's heart.

President Bush went on TV yesterday looking dire, saying that every day the economic bailout is delayed poses increased risks and costs to our nation's and the world's economy. Yikes. How would you like to be a congressman with that kind of pressure to pass legislation? This is the kind of decision that will have a profound impact in many areas, and every detail is important. I would not want to rush into it, but rather make sure everything is done right. Again, it's a good day to pray for our lawmakers and the future of our country.
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Our church is celebrating "Missions Week" when missionaries from around the globe come and talk about their experiences. My family hosted a dinner for a dozen people last night with a local missionary who works at a Christian radio station. The station plays Christian rock and rap, geared for teens and young audiences.
This is such an important ministry because teens today are bombarded with negative images in the media, MTV, advertisements, commercials, adn the Net. They definitely need something uplifting. The Christian rock station offers kids positive and wholesome songs, recorded with high-quality studio production in a wide variety of styles.
Christian music has come a long way in the last 20 years and provides a worthwhile and quality alternative to young listeners.
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Today is Eid ul-Fitr, or "Feast of Fast Breaking," when Muslims celebrate the end of Ramadan. I'm heading out to one of the local mosques to write about the Islamic holiday.
Yesterday, I finally had the chance to watch "Obsession," the controversial DVD about radical Muslims.
While there are truths to the documentary (there have to be, otherwise the documentary would not merit any concern at all) it also distorted many things and made some dangerous and hateful correlations.
Linking Islamic extremists to Nazi Germany, for example, is a totally unfair assertion that seeks to incite hatred and fear. Those are totally different scenarios and the comparison is invalid.
To its credit, the documentary does state clearly in the introduction that the majority of Muslims are peaceful, law-abiding citizens. It's only a very small percentage who are out to destroy America and the West, who denounce us, burn U.S. flags, and call us "the Great Satan."
But that small percentage of radicals are the ones who attacked America on 9/11, blew up the London subway and the Madrid trains, killed more than 200 Marines in Lebanon, killed hundreds at a Bali nightclub, etc. It is a very small faction, but one that is too dangerous to be ignored.
It's a tragedy for the 99-plus percent of good Muslims whose lives and reputations have suffered because of the deeds and threats of a few maniacal extremists. The vast majority of good Muslims have suffered the most. They have, as I've been told many times, had their religion hijacked by radicals.
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Sylvania, Ohio
Oct. 1, 2008

I went to a central city church to cover a talk Wednesday night by the Rev. Al Sharpton, the noted civil rights leader from New York City.
My editor was under the impression Sharpton was going to talk about politics. But on Wednesday night, he was there to preach the Gospel. His politicking was to take place on Thursday, he told me afterward, and he came to Toledo a day earlier because he was invited to preach at the Worship Center in Toledo's Old West End neighborhood.
You always hear about Sharpton's civil rights activities but he is an amazing preacher. The 54-year-old Baptist minister spoke about how God uses unlikely people to do his work, including Moses and Abraham. Rather than pick the perfect "big shots," he picks the less likely people because that way they know it was God's power and not human ability.
At times, Sharpton was shouting and dancing and the organist, Chris Byrd, was accenting each sermon line with a burst from the keyboards. The crowd was shouting and waving their hands and dancing around at times.
It was a powerful service and the music that preceded the sermon really rocked the house. What made it even more interesting was that the church is the former First Unitarian Church of Toledo, which could not be more different in style and substance than the church that has moved into its former building.
Here's the article I wrote.
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A funny side note: I asked the local church leaders for a few minutes with Al Sharpton after the service, feeling that I had to get something political for the article. They told me the preacher needed to change his clothes and then afterward he would meet with the media. (I had seen a TV crew earlier but I think they were gone by then.)
I pressed them because I was on a tight deadline, and Sharpton graciously agreed to talk right away after the service. I was invited back into the pastor's office, where I interviewed him through an open door to the closet, sight unseen, while he was changing his clothes.
It was a bit awkward but at least he was willing to accommodate me. And when he was finished he came out and we spoke for a few minutes eye to eye.
In my 30-plus years in journalism, that was the first time I've ever interviewed someone through a closet door.
* * *
I had been looking forward to seeing Gore Vidal speak last night in the Authors! Authors! lecture series in Toledo. But it was canceled due to an unexplained injury to Vidal, who is 83 years old now. He is a great writer and quite controversial at times, and I'm sure his talk would have been entertaining.
I hope he's OK and that he reschedules his Toledo talk.
UPDATE: Gore fell at his home; no Toledo visit has been rescheduled.
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Sylvania, Ohio
Oct. 17, 2008

A lawsuit filed by members of a closed parish, St. Joseph Catholic Church in Salem, Ohio, has been settled by mediation.
The ex-parishioners formed a nonprofit organization called St. Joseph Salem Heritage Society that will be able to use their old church and property but with restrictions. They will need to get permission of the pastor of another local, active parish if they want to hold any sacramental services.
The suit had been filed in Wyandot County Common Pleas Court.
* * *
I spent all of last night at a church board meeting. It's a tricky time trying to plan 2009 budgets when the economy is falling apart right before our very eyes. Do you step forward in faith and trust God to provide, or do you use (biblical) wisdom and scale things back, anticipating a down year?
I think I've spent too much time reading and writing about Joel Osteen lately. He really believes you can talk yourself into a down year, or you have a good year by thinking positively.
Our church came up with a great plan, I think, where we keep the '09 budget the same as '08 but with some discretionary budget items that can go unspent if the money's not there. A wise compromise, in my opinion.
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We watched a video of Craig Groeschel from LifeChurch.tv that he gave at Willow Creek's Leadership Summit in August. I watched it live in August but truly enjoyed it the second time around.
Groeschel is a gifted speaker, speaking spiritual truths and saying them in a contemporary and entertaining way. He's got a great sense of humor and oddly enough looks a lot like Tom Cruise when he smiles.
Put that all together and it's no wonder his church is growing rapidly, and also in innovative ways. He preaches in Oklahoma and his message is broadcast live via satellite to about a dozen churches across the country. LifeChurch.tv gets more than 23,000 people at their weekend services even though the largest facility they have seats 1,700 people.
He's spoke about a new book he's written, which I have yet to read but would like to, called "IT: How Churches and Leaders Can Get IT and Keep IT."
He ended his talk by quoting a Franciscan benediction that was so profound and beautiful I just have to share it with you:

"May God bless you with discomfort at easy answers, half truths, and superficial relationships so that you may live deep within your heart.
May God bless you with an anger at injustice, oppression, and exploitation of people, so that you may work for justice, freedom, and peace.
May God bless you with tears to shed for those who suffer from pain, rejection, starvation, and war, so that you may reach out your hand to comfort them and to turn their pain into joy.
And may God bless you with enough foolishness to believe that you can make a difference in this world, so that you can do what others claim cannot be done."